by WildChild

“I apologize for putting on your wife’s sweater at the party. And then her skirt. And then her make-up. And then coming back out to do an impression of her.” // The Good Greatsby

The Good Greatsby

Thank you for inviting me to the party.

Also, I apologize for my behavior at the party.

Thank you for the delicious food served at the party.

I apologize for filling my backpack with the delicious food and trying to sell it to the other guests at the party.

Thank you for telling me to make myself at home when I arrived at the party.

I apologize for assuming that because I hit on my wife at my home, making myself at home at your home would include hitting on your wife at the party.

Thank you for showing me your home videos during the party.

I apologize for pointing out your children’s lack of stage presence in the home videos we watched at the party.

Thank you for allowing me to perform my magic act at the party.

I apologize for being unable to make your kids reappear at…

View original post 241 more words